“Every moment is a choice, and every choice reverberates . . . Every moment presents an opportunity to ‘pay it forward’.”

Abuse is not a chosen lifestyle for the child placed there by the abuser. Sandy Brewer relates the trauma of rejection and abuse [...]]]> Sandy Brewer
Pursuit of Light: An Extraordinary Journey
Peach Tree House, 2007, 224 pages, $24.95
ISBN: 978-0-9796554-4-9
(Self-help, Memoir, Inspirational)

“Every moment is a choice, and every choice reverberates . . .
Every moment presents an opportunity to ‘pay it forward’.”

Abuse is not a chosen lifestyle for the child placed there by
the abuser. Sandy Brewer relates the trauma of rejection and
abuse she lived through as a child, and how she chose to reach
a better life where, eventually, she found love and acceptance.

When faced with a situation, in this case abuse based on
rejection by her mother, the way out is by choice. Either
choosing to succumb to the abuse, or to follow the line of abuse
and grow to be an abuser as well, or to come to terms with
oneself, and choose to overcome the abusive environment to
reach the light, the other way of life—the environment of being
loved and accepted by others. But how is this done? For one, it
demands courage, and lots of it. Sandy was a very courageous child,
who withstood harsh, brutal beatings and verbal abuse from her mother.
To be able to bear it is hard to comprehend.

From being kicked and flung into the wall at the age of two, to
being forced by a father to drink a ‘poisoned’ drink, Brewer’s
willpower to survive pulled her through. Yet with all she went
through as a child, she was able to find the courage and
determination to end the familial cycle of abuse, one she was
determined not to pass on to her future generations.

Brewer uses a technique of flashbacks to take the reader back to
her abusive childhood. By doing so, she is telling two stories
side-by-side: the first story is the one of her horrific childhood living
in an abusive environment, the second her life as an adult and her
journey out of the dark into the light. Brewer is proof that miracles happen.

I liked the way I was drawn to keep reading, the realization of
questioning what else could possibly follow as if this (whatever was
mentioned) wasn’t bad enough. I found a connection to the uncertainty
an adoptee experiences, even in the best stable and peaceful family
surroundings, where Brewer writes, “. . . I was aware of the blank,
missing pieces of my life. I just didn’t know what they were, and I had no
one to turn to, no one to ask about it. . . “

The heavy use of dialogue throughout helps us see the characters
much more in depth than had she chosen to use simple prose. The
combination of lessons Brewer intends to teach the reader weaved
into the story line makes for an easy read of a very disturbing and
otherwise difficult to read subject.

I highly recommend that every new parent read Brewer’s book to
experience the effects of parental abuse on children and hope it will
lead to the correct choice, and an end to parental abuse. The world
will be a better place to live if only this could be achieved.

To learn more about the author and the book visit

www.PusuitOfLight.com.

What do you think–is parental abuse a cycle passed on from
generation to generation? Have you read this book? Leave a
comment or questions for Sandy below.

Till next time,

Gloria

Here is an article I’d like to share with parents on how you can better connect with your child’s teacher and by doing so ensure the success of your child in school.

Parents Are Best Resource for Ensuring Student Success

(NewsUSA) – To maximize [...]]]> What have you been doing to further the education of yourself and your family?

Here is an article I’d like to share with parents on how you can better connect with your child’s teacher and by doing so ensure the success of your child in school.

Parents Are Best Resource for Ensuring Student Success

(NewsUSA) – To maximize their child’s educational experience, parents should go back to school. But don’t dust off the book covers and No. 2 pencils just yet. This experience only requires learning the ABCs of parental involvement – specifically, opening the lines of communication through parent-teacher conferences.

“We know parents are busy, but it is important to carve out time to invest in your child’s education and ensure success at school,” said National Education Association President Reg Weaver. “To get the most out of parent-teacher conferences, parents need to take an active role in their child’s education year-round and come prepared to discuss how their child can reach his full potential.”

NEA, representing 3.2 million educators, offers the following tips for getting the most out of parent-teacher conferences:

Get ready. Do your homework prior to parent-teacher conferences. Prepare by writing notes to yourself concerning:

* Any questions about the school’s programs or policies.

* Things you can share with the teacher about your child and his life at home.

* Questions about your child’s progress.

Ask important questions.

Don’t be afraid to engage in a frank conversation with your child’s teacher. Your goal is to develop an action plan for your child’s success at school.

Good questions to ask the teacher include the following:

* What are my child’s strengths and weaknesses?

* How does my child get along with classmates?

* Is my child working up to his ability? Where could he use improvement?

* What can we do at home to support what you are doing in the classroom?

Initiate the action plan.

Start immediately on the action plan you and the teacher put together. Discuss the plan with your child and track his progress.

Stay in touch with your child’s teacher throughout the year with regularly scheduled “report card” conferences that can keep the communication lines open.

“Parents are the best resource for a child to make the grade,” Weaver said. “When teachers and parents work together, we can help a child have a successful school year.”

For more information and tips, visit www.nea.org/aew .

Till next time

Gloria